him

i havent thought this hard about him in a few years.  all i want is to hear his voice… to talk to him.  even if it is just for a minute i just want to know how hes doing.  funny how we tend to feel about the ‘one who got away.’

i shouldnt feel this way.  if he wanted to talk to me, he could find me, right?  im not that hard to find.  i know im a hell of alot easier to find online than he is.

a part of me is telling myself that he doesnt want to hear from me, see me, talk to me, whatever… but at the same time a part of me is telling myself that i’ll never know unless i do find him.

i do know that i miss him.

fuck.